Staying friends when romance doesn't quite work out

a.k.a. that time I dated two guys who were roommates

When I was 25, I went on a date with a cute boy from OkCupid named James (name changed). He was in my phone as “James Punnilingus” – and still is, to this day – because his dating profile contained a pun related to his passion for performing oral sex (hot). Obviously, I had high hopes about the date.

We went to my favorite restaurant for lunch, because h…